Princess Diary, Part 1.

It was towards the end of our pointe class. We stood in center, our teacher smiled and gave us The Talk about repertory and dancing variations. On pointe. The been-there-done-that-crowd did not flinch, but my heart stopped. I knew this was coming, there had been hints, but my teacher had spoken of later next year. Not of the here and now! I half figured that because of our mixed-level class she was talking to the advanced girls who were probably itching to do more than echappés and piqués in center. But no, there was no sorting into groups, no directions for me (or anyone else) to sit in the corner and observe. My teacher pressed play, said something about Sleeping Beauty and took the beginning pose of B-plus, arms crossed delicately in front. My barely recovered heart sank, further down still.

I felt like I had taken an odd turn, missed the sign "Mom of Aurora" and entered the wrong casting. Because no way is this adult dancer a bluebird-wooing, sprightly, pretty, petite, ballet-y princess. You want to scare me away? Flaunt a tutu into my face and I´ll jeté into the opposite direction. Of course, our teacher did not throw the entire variation before us, just the beginning piqués and grand ronde jambes and bourrés. So, really nothing we haven´t done before, except for the piqués followed by the sweeping leg to the side (well, it was new to me anyway). And those arms. I have never felt such a strong urge to call it quits. And quit I did, right there and then.

I could put part of the blame on my big toe, which was crying for release and ice (too much pressure and not enough padding underneath), but that would not even be half of the truth. The ugly truth, Dear Reader,  is that I fear repertory. I fear looking like I´ve come without an invite, crashed the party, trespassed from my seat in the audience right onto the stage. When that Bluebird music started to play, I could not get the image of a real ballerina out of my head - and me making mockery of her!

Deep down I know my logic is lacking, as really all of our exercises and enchaînements are bits and pieces of variations or preparations thereof. I have even been on stage before, in our spring shows, dancing to the music of Swan Lake and Coppelia. But back then I was part of the "corps de ballet", with my feet safely ensconed in soft slippers, not precariously footed on pointe. This repertory business however, is new and alien territory to me.

The thing is, and this might seem curious to some, I was not lured into ballet by the sight of the ballerina-in-the-music-box. As a twelve year old I thought Giselle in her floating tulle lovely, but the princess in a tutu held no appeal to me at all. In fact it took me years to appreciate her iconic status and not regard the hopping on pointe with the bopping tutu as silly. What drew me to ballet instead was (and still is) the architectural line of the arabesque, the flight of grand jetés, the music drawn into movement.

I never imagined me dancing any roles or characters and certainly nothing remotely princess-y. I figured that kind of dancing to be the exclusive domain of the "good girls" (as one of my former teachers liked to call them - compared to the adult rest of us). You know, the ballerinas in training, and those who have danced since they have walked. Dancers with ballet-class cred, the "look" and that enviable trait of je-ne-sais-quoi.. Whereby you take one pose and are instantly transformed into something out of this world, out of my world.

The Sleeping Beauty
Stephanie Williams of Australian Ballet.
Photo: Liz Ham.

Real life and fairy tales, ballet class and repertory.. I do realise that not all of ballet is princess-y. Just as I understand that portraying a majestic countenance on stage is an essential part of it all. Something to do with Catherine de Medici and that Sunny King of France. Ballet was first the spectacle of royalty, and the unwed virgin Princess among their heroines (funny how Disney held on to that). The tiara- and tutu-clad Princess on Pointe has long since become the iconic look of the female ballet dancer. And here lies my whopper of insecurity: princesses and tutus and me - we are no match made for the stage. There are, admittedly, body- and self-image issues involved.

Grown-ups who dance ballet for the joy, do not have to look the part. Professional dancers do. We may come in all sizes and shapes, but all we need is to focus on our placement and line, on the music and the corrections we get. Yet we are drawn to the image of the ballet-body beautiful - and most of us are not so wise and mature as to never compare ourselves. And yes, in comparison I do find my instrument sadly lacking! When thoses Fairy Godmothers dealt out their favors, they threw some bounce at me and then skipped and hopped away.  Ballon, yes. Talent for ballet, no. I´m not talking about musicality or eye for movement, or intellect and perseverance. What I lack is balletic talent; physical suitability such as good turn-out and natural flexibility, and that look of long and lean legs, a small butt and slim hips. One nice left foot does not yet a ballerina make.

So, I´m short and squat, broad-shouldered, curvy and compact. So what? What I and every other sometime insecure adult-not-quite-a-ballerina needs to understand, is that it does not matter. Not as much as we like to think. In ballet you essentially aim to create an illusion - that of infinite lines and flight. You achieve this by work, not talent alone. Every able-bodied can strengthen their core, lengthen the back, stretch those knees, pointe them feet. You breathe, you elongate, you live, you love to dance. The bottom line is that the shape(liness) of your derrière does not stand in the way of the loveliness of your ligne!

The princess is just another illusion. She is created by the lines you draw onto the music, by épaulement, port de bras, a pas here, another enchaînement there. Dancing her should not be mission impossible. Granted, a grown-up ballet dancer would be an odd casting for the part of virgin bride-to-be Aurora. But it does not have to be a choice between the teenage princess and the walk-on part of mothers or queens. Though in real life.. I´d rather be the Empress residing over her court than the talent called to entertain at her daughters pre-nuptials.

As for myself, I´m still finding my voice as a dancer. Anything that goes beyond the purely technical is still fairly new to me. Only in the past year have I thought about "presenting myself" in ballet, whether it´s a forwarded ankle or an attempt at elegance. Princess Florestine? Not quite there yet. Although, after the initial shock faded and I later confided in my teacher - about my fears, insecurities and bad memories - something changed. I looked at that particular variation (and others) with a fresh perspective and new attention to detail. In our next class, our teacher broke the steps down and - lo and behold - I could actually pull it off!

Now, let me just unearth and rediscover my latent inner princess. A modern single gal wooing her Prince. Somewhere between Princess Florestine and Charlotte of Sex and the City. The tutus you do not have to bother with, but darlings - I´ll wear the tiara. Those are real diamonds, right?

Achoo!

Home alone and sniffling my time away - yes, flu season has officially begun. Being sick is boring and not nice, but being a sick dancer equals being one unhappy camper! Yesterday I still gave it all I got, and did 90 minutes of advanced ballet class and 60 minutes of pointe. I knew that Flu was hanging out around the corner, but I told It to wait until Wednesday. See, there is no ballet today and none tomorrow (no class that I would hate to miss anyway). It´s really amazing how much ballet can motivate you! Sadly, it can delay but not chase viruses away. So, rest it is. I would very much like to be in acceptable shape by Friday, and being generally of sturdy disposition, that might just be possible. With a little help of some nasal spray - because no one likes to turn chaînés déboulés with a runny nose!

In the meantime, I´m drinking loads of hot honey-water and emptying my trusted vaporub jar. Hmm.. there should be some Tiger Balm somewhere too.. Luckily, this Flu around I´m spared the light-sensitive eyes and can at least while my day away in front of of my dear little macbook. Thank you twitter, facebook and youtube! And thanks to a generous dancer friend, I also have the entire Bournonville School borrowed, that is a 2-disc DVD-set of all the classic lessons! I just finished watching the "Monday Lessons" and was pleasantly suprised to find the beginning port de bras of our Friday´s adagio in lesson nr 2! The pirouettes from grand plié fifth, and the turning positions with foot in coud-de-pieds also rang a bell, as did some steps sequences. I mean, I knew our teacher was incorporating some Bournonville into our classes, but only when she had told us. I had no idea that so many moves are straight out of Denmark. :)

Wish I could share at least one lesson here, but even if copyright were a non-issue, I don´t have the tech skills to do that. Really, how do people clip those videos on youtube? Well, it does not matter as I found this very lovely video of Bournonville´s Flower Festival in Genzano, danced by The Royal Danish Ballet itself. I happen to be quite partial to RDB - my own teacher G´s first teacher was a soloist there, and my other teacher M-P was a principal dancer at RDB until 2008. The soloist who dances in the clip below, Gudrun Bojesen, is also featured in the School DVD, so there you go. What I find so inspiring about Bournoville is the apparent effortlessness - especially since it is the hardest thing of all! Minden does list Bournonville´s Choreographic Creed in her Ballet Companion, and I find this quote particularily convincing:

"Dance, with the help of music, can raise itself to poetry but it can also sink to buffoonery through an excess of gymnastics. The so-called difficult has numerous adepts, while the apparently easy is only achieved by a chosen few." 

When I get tired of being online, or of watching videos and daytime-TV - and yes, that can happen, there are books to read. You know, actual books made out of paper and ink. Not kindles. That very nice dancer friend of mine, the same who borrowed me her Bournonville, just happens to have an amazing dance-book library! Right now I´m reading Gaynor Minden´s Ballet Companion (Book Depository), and Eric Franklin´s Conditioning for Dance. I´ve also got my own Inside Ballet Technique by Valerie Grieg, which I definetely recommend! Now, I gotta share some of Minden´s wisdom with you.. Especially as I´m working on a Balletiquette co-post with fellow blogger Bead109. Here goes:

"Always finish every combination. Even if you flub it completely, the discipline of ballet requires that you finish it, and finish it with as much poise as you can." - So very true! And never mind that it is required, because it actually makes you a better dancer. Your technique wil improve heaps if you never give up!

"Know where to stand." When you go to a new school/class, look out for fixed barre spots. "Dancers are as territorial as lions." - Hahahhaa, guilty! :D Seriously, it makes sense to rotate barre spots and center placements. But sometimes set barre places make for speedy beginnings. And for some reason it´s just comforting & familiar to have "your own place". For instance, in Madame´s class, spots just fixed themselves as the same crowd kept coming back. I will not give up mine, so back off. Thank you, darling. ;)

"Stay after class and practice any step that´s given  your trouble." - This does not relate to etiquette, but it´s good advice nonetheless. Of course this option is not a given, as often there are other classes after your own. Or you really have to rush to the bus/home/work/wherever. Or the studio is closing. But when there is opprtunity, use it! As for myself, I  have never been able to rush out of class. Even when new people are streaming in, I quickly try out some moves (then get out of the way, just as quick). When our class has been the last, I often practice until I´m kicked out. Sometimes I´m lucky and get extra help and coaching from my teacher.

Dang, I´m running out of kleenex. Glad though I got some writing done, despite my scratchy throat and runny nose. Now, excuse me if I sink back into my couch and watch Tuesday´s lessons. Nothing like the prospect of ballet class to fight the flu!

Pointe-Anniversary!

Dear Reader, it was precisely one year ago when I embarked on my very first pointe class. Before I tied those satin ribbons, I had long ago given up on pointe shoes. I figured that after 16 years of dancing in slippers and never going higher than demi (with the exception of one sorry and short-lived attempt in my twenties) - what would be the pointe? In slippers I don´t suck too much, that is I have fairly good technique for a late starter and adult recreational dancer. Of course there is no crowd lining up to see me perform, but on a good day I do well enough to get my kicks out of my jetés and some praise to boot. On bad days I still love it enough to keep coming back. What more could a girl ask for?

Happy Hour at the Barre (November 13, 2010)

But when my own teacher opened the door to pointe and invited me in - all of a sudden there was no doubt in my mind. I knew right away that no way would I deny myself this opportunity. Come hell and high water, bloody blisters and akwardness. Now, nearly 50 classes and three pairs of shoes later, I have advanced from akward to slightly less-than-akward - that is from pointe beginner to pointe basic-er. And dare I say it, I´m actually a little bit proud of myself!

1000 Minutes on Pointe (December 13, 2010)

Last Friday I went back in time, and re-started at pointe beginner level. Our school offers two classes, beginner and basic, and I take both. Classes have always been mixed; one year ago there were only two complete beginners: me and a friend of mine. This year, there are a lot more hopefuls and eager new dancers, and I hope they will find it just as exciting as I did. And still do, if not even more. Yes, more. Dancing more does not take away your hunger, it feeds it. Sure, at first exercises are difficult as hell and you think it will never amount to anything. But then your body starts to change, responding differently to your commands, becoming compliant instead of defiant.

In Memoriam: My First Pointe Shoes (February 10, 2011)

When I decided to make the jump out of the comfort of my slippers, I knew big challenges lay ahead. Having walked in uncomfortable shoes before (like most women I know), I figured that pointes would be no Birkenstocks. I had done some exercises like echappés and bourrés on demi, and done my research beforehand. I knew that getting over the box is a big deal, and that you would need to pull up and not sit in your shoes. Yeah, pointe technique turned out to be as difficult as I had expected. And then some. I could not get over my box. Pulling up on one foot, with a stretched knee and strong core - no easy feat. When Madame told us to be elegant, I was going for comedic. Pirouettes on pointe? Scary as hell. 

Potential (April 30, 2011)

That´s the thing - when your´re a grown-up ballet dancer, you know all that can go wrong. Instead of doing the pre-teen thing and being fearless and eager, you fear falling over. But I consider myself lucky. For one, I have had the best teachers you could ask for - they pushed me out of my comfort zone, but never let me pointe alone. They have been meticulous about proper alignment and technique, and encouraging when I had the hardest time suspending my disbelief!

Cheers!  (June 3, 2011)

Since that first class and Pointe Zero, I have improved and learned a lot. My feet are arching over the boxes, single leg relevés have become less daunting and I have just embarked on my first balanced pirouettes (singles still). But you know what the best part is? Despite all my research, the blisters and the achy feet and the killer-slow roll-up relevés, and the burn - I had not figured I would love it as much! It´s a whole new world out there, waiting to be conquered. One plié, piqué and pointed foot at a time..

Back to School!

It´s that time of the year again.. The Finnish summer drawing to its close, days getting shorter, mornings colder, sun-sets more spectacular. The Rowan trees lining my street are heavy with orange berries, and that August moon looms large above the sky. Fall beckons. It is time for harvests as much as it is for new beginnings. Schools all over Finland start next Monday. Our dance studio introduces its fall/winter semester. How much fun is it to go back to school and actually look forward to it?

My kind of class-room. Dance-center Footlight.

Of course I never left (dance school that is). Those of you who read my summer posts know that I´ve been on a Summer Dancathon from beginning of July until now. I got back into the habit of daily ballet class (excluding weekends), which is awesome. So, if there have been no breaks for me, why am joining the back-to-school chorus? For one, the dance schedule is all new. But more importantly, my favorite regular teachers are back. It´s been seven weeks since I had class with G, and over 3 months since M-P´s last ballet class. I absolutely love their teaching, so you can imagine how much I´m looking forward to a new semester!

Do you remember what it was like going back to school (not dance-) after those long summers? The excitement of seeing your friends again, who appeared at once familiar yet different? You all had grown, experienced new things, and changed in the process.. I feel a bit like that right now. Except for that growth spurt which I´m still waiting for. Seriously, something is different. You know how five classes a week can do wonders for the body and technique? Well, it´s true. Although, my pirouttes have made only rare appearances. For that I still blame my teacher G, who told Summer Sub that I had advanced to triple turns the past year. I guess she was a little proud, but my Pirouette Fairy took it as a cue to take off on holiday, laughing all the way to the beach, mojito in hand.. Silvia, our Summer Sub, never saw a single triple. Singles, yes, and shoddy doubles, but no triple pirouettes. Sorry, signora G!

That´s our fabulous teacher M-P!

Pirouettes aside, I think I learned a lot this summer. I have grown more confident in my use of épaulemant, and in the phrasing of movement to music. In class, there has been more focus on performing, on dancing before an (imaginary) audience, and on interpreting the mood of the music, not just counting the beats. I have learned to relax more. We tend to get caught up in technique, often tensing up instead of dancing with the optimum amount of effort. Dancing 100% all the time is actually counter-productive! I have also learned to be more conscious of my transitions - to be fluid in movement, not superfluous.

My "own barre-spot" is in the corner, next to the speaker.

I had a great time learning & dancing with our Summer Sub, and I´m really going to miss her teaching. But I´m also eager to apply my new and improved skill to our regular classes! I wonder if my "own" teachers will notice anything.. So, beginning next week I have three advanced and two pointe classes lined up. One of those pointe classes is actually marked as basic (last year was beginner), but with our teacher M-P, basic is more closer to intermediate. I just hope she goes easy on us for the first classes! I´m still gathering courage to even try out those pirouettes en dedans! Rising onto one foot while turning at the same time - scary! But piqué pirouettes - so much fun! It´s a good thing that there is balance between the two. I seem to remember it was a bit like that in school too, fun and sometime scary.

Now, let´s see.. My hair is freshly cut, favorite leo washed, new pointe shoes broken in, still need to sew elastics on flats, read that "Inside Ballet Technique" book and call it an early night come Sunday. I am ready - back to school it is!

Putting theory into practice.

The Bar/re

Ever been to an informal get-together of dancers and seen anyone sitting on chairs, fixed at their table placing, for the entire time? Nope, didn't think so. Dancers tend to migrate to the floor, always stretching and limbering up their bodies. And if we're not limbering up our bodies, we are dancing. Relevés while getting the plates out of the cupboard, penché arabesques when picking up something from the floor. Heck, pirouettes whenever there's enough space. I've done mine in the kitchen..

In the company of fellow dancers, nobody thinks anything of it. It is perfectly acceptable and normal behavior. Seriously, it's hardly a wonder that the body stays in dancer-mode 24/7. That is what practice is all about, to make the physics of dance an integral part of your system. Once you have converted your body to ballet, it seeks every opportunity to move in its now natural state! A dancer is a dancer, outside of class and out of leos and tights, and even between dances. As for myself, I'm no pro, far from it, but I cannot help but feel my ballet body take over!

Sadly, out of class there are not that many opportunities. No piqué turns in office corridors, no checking out lines in every mirror, no grand jetés in the park, no waltzing to the bus-stop. Ballet is life, but life is not a ballet. Or is it? Last Thursday, after another fun & challenging ballet class, my ballet sis spontaneously suggested that we head for a post-ballet drink. Despite it being a work-night, I could refuse neither the good company nor the chilled bubbly. It was a lovely evening, warm enough to sit outside and relax into girl-talk and ballet-chat. Perfect, except for the sitting-in-place. Because when we got up to leave, we were both all stiff and sore. Pretty sure this is not the norm with non-dancers..?

Someone fixed that barre all wrong!

Must have been the bubbly (Spanish cava), but it got me into thinking about a bar for dancers only. You know of après-ski, the hot chocolate and sitting by the fire, relaxing? I would like to propose a similar space where tired dancers can spread out on a cushioned floor, stretching with refreshing drinks in hand. Protein-enriched banana smoothies or sparkly bubbly, whatever works for you. And as for the actual bar, remember the railing where you can put your feet? Lift the whole thing up, and presto: you have the barre at the bar. Mirrors optional.

But why stop there? Lets add a jacuzzi and sauna, plus epsom-salt foot-baths and free massages! Come to think of it, and leaving the bar out of it (just for a second) - why are dance studios not more like fancy gyms? Dance classes cost more, spaces are essentially the same (except for the dance-flooring), and showers are there already. Yet in Finland, where saunas are everywhere, not a single dance-studio has one. Except for the National Opera House. They heat their sauna every day. Lucky dancers, but I think they deserve it.

But back to The Bar/re. It's a funny and fitting coincidence, that our building used to host one of the more popular (and later, infamous) night clubs in Helsinki. Many, many years ago I stood at that bar, drink in hand, two floors under our current barre-filled studio space. That club is long since gone, but others have come since. One time last spring we left after our evening Friday class, just in time for the opening of an new club. The red carpet had been rolled out, rose petals were strewn and hunky doormen were giving us way. After our reverance to Swan Lake´s music, it only seemed appropriate. Darlings, I'll have champagne with that..

Sleepy Bunhead

You know you´ve had enough of the dancing when you wake up, stand up and are actually relieved that there is no dancing on the day! The body is tired, and brain might like something other than ballet for a change.. Happened to me this lovely Saturday, after one week of working nine to five, followed by dancing between five to nine. Ah, the bliss of daily dancing - which can only be dimmed by the less-than-blissful morning trek to work and back. Nah, seriously, I like my job and the means it provides - but merging my work schedule with life & dance is quite the challenge! Especially when my inner clock is still in holiday sleep-in-late-mode..

Mondays and Tuesdays I get home from class reasonably early, before 8 PM (20:00 hrs) - still plenty of time for whatever else. However, on Wednesdays and Thurdays classes end after 8.30 PM, which means I´m home just before 10 PM. At that point I´m starving, tired and if it´s been a good class, way too wired for sleep. Should be in bed within one hour, but with facebooking, the blogging and the tweeting, the stretching and the eating - no can do. Before you know, it´s past midnight and I´m looking at less than 6 hours worth of sleep. Dang! Did I mention that I´m so not a morning person?

When you dance daily, rest is vital. But don´t try to hold off with the R&R until the weekend, or else your dancing suffers. Fatigue is not just a serious buzz-kill but also detrimental to muscle tonus. Any dancer knows that in order to dance full out, you need your brain and body to work in optimum harmony! Now I just need to follow my own advice.. By the time the past week had reached Friday I could have slept standing up. Class was late in the evening, so I went home first. Any sane, non-dancing person would have hit the couch and stayed there. But has sanity ever stopped me from dancing? Nope. Nor did it stop the attack of the yawns midway through class - which my teacher of course noticed! How embarrassing.. To my defense, the air inside was hot, humid and stagnant. I was not the only one feeling its slumbering effect!

So, what do you do when Big Sleep is but a wink away and you´re still in class? If there is imminent danger of you crashing into anyone, or hurting yourself, then of course stop! Tell the teacher that you have to sit out, but don´t leave the class (unless you are falling asleep just sitting there). Stay until the end, watch and try to learn something, and if the class ends with reverance, get up and finish in style. Do, however, not make a habit of this! Once is really enough.

If you can still manage, do pace yourself. Dance clean, do not mark but don´t push too hard either. As for myself, I have danced so long that I just went on autopilot. Of course it helped that the class was of beginner-intermediate level, and all the exercises familiar. But I missed a couple of steps anyway. Did a grand jeté developpé when there should have been a straight leg, and wobbled on my center grand plies. But class was not an entire waste. We did this exercise in center where you temps levé into arabesque, then walse around with the back arabesque leg coming forward and through.  Caught myself in the mirror and realised that I was rushing and losing proper ligne in the process. Autopilot and auto-correct, not too bad for a dancer half-asleep. ;)

Oops, I´m doing it again - it´s 11 PM! Sweet dancing dreams everyone!

Le Spectre de la Rose. Nurejev and Fonteyn.

Driven

All vacations must come to an end, and mine - sadly no exception. Come Monday morning, the alarm will ring at 6:00 AM and this summer will never be the same again. Goodbye to deliberate idleness and days spent sunbathing, swimming, sitting in cafés with the girls.. and dancing. Wait! There will be no end to the dancing. My vacation may be over and done with (truly it is), but my summer dancathon is still in full swing!

I do worry a little that there is no cutting back, now that I´ve gotten used to my daily dose of dance again. And why should I not enjoy it while I still can? Hello, not getting any younger here! I have also noticed some improvement in my dancing, and not just in the purely technical. There might actually be a hint of artistry, just a whiff, in a port de bras, or phrasing of the music.. I really, really want and need to see where this is going.

This means that for the foreseeable future I will either rush from the office to class, or I will be home just in time to get to bed. Not every day of the week, but five at least. In the summer it comes easy, because the sun sets late and days just seem longer. In the cold and dark of Finnish winter - another story. But ballet class has always been my strongest motivator. I suppose you could call me driven.

Desire - dedication - drive. Three words I have no difficulty associating with dance. You begin with desire, with the hope of becoming a proficient and active participant in the art of ballet. You may dream of pas de deux with Marcelo, of octoplet pirouettes and standing ovations, but even simple tendus and pliés already equal happiness.

Dedication is where you turn desire into consistent and real work, and into quality. It does not matter that it is all recreational. The reward lies in the dancing itself, in the countless hours dedicated to barre and center, and maybe the occasional recital.

Drive will propel your forward, but finally it is the dancing that will take you places. Away from yourself and back again, but never returned the same. For me, therein lies the magic. Can you really blame me if I keep coming back for more?

Source: www.flickr.com

Ups and Downs: Pliés, not Life.

Ballet class, center pirouette exercise: tombé pas de bourré into fourth, foutté turn with right leg ronde to the back - TPDB into fourth, double pirouette en dehors - TPDB into fourth, fouetté turn into preparation for en dedans pirouette - turn - plié - sous tenu turn - tombé - pirouette arabesque (arms ups) - plié - arms open - pirouette en dendans (arms up). There is no pause in the last pirouette combination, you turn, plié and turn. Or are thrown off your axis, like me..

Now here´s the "trick" to survive: after down, comes up. Up, down, up, down. Or like our teacher Silvia said: it is very much like in real life. I know what she was getting at, it´s an easy comparison to draw.. But, as we know, life is not always fair. There are no guarantees that after "down" comes the inevitable "up". Sometimes shit happens. But not so in ballet! Even if learning ballet is like riding the metaphorical rollercoaster. Your learning curve will take you high, and then you will plummet, gather speed again and plataeu, buy a new ticket and ride up again. Only with learning ballet you will eventually advance, despite the rides down with the arms flailing and the screaming. Wait, no screaming in ballet class. But fun! 

James Whiteside and Melissa Hough of the Boston Ballet. Source: here.

Then there is the actual, physical act of going up and down. No metaphors here. If you want to jump, you plié first to push off. We know that the same applies to turns. Strangely, we keep forgetting this. Pliés become too easily habitual and perfunctory, and in the process we are robbed of their full potential! That is why our teacher threw the life-must-have-its-up-and-downs metaphor us. We were doing the pirouette exercise as if the directional line was fixed by a level, when we should have been going down, up, down, up.. Using our pliés, and the rebound energy they provide. Our teacher demonstrated again, and we tried our best to follow suit. Whaddya know - it worked!

Of course we all know the theory behind the plié, and its purpose. But I urge each and everyone of you to pay extra attention next time you dance. Make those pliés count, and not just in the obvious jumps. Dare to go down, and deeper. Trust that at least in ballet this action will always bring you right back up. Literally and figuratively.

Dance-Vacation: Highs and Lows. Mostly Highs.

Second week of my summer dancathon and both my Pirouette Fairy and Inner Ballerina have ganged up on me. Drinking their mojitos somewhere on a sunny beach (which currently is not here), having a blast, thinking it´s their vacation. Just you wait.. Ladies, this is a dance-vacation! Now get your asses back in here!

Seriously, my initial holiday-buzz has faded a bit.. When you´re staying at home, you still have to do the dishes, cook the food, clean the house, listen to the upstair´s dogs bark, take the same bus to the city.. While friends are jetting off to Chianti, Italy or to Paris or Tokyo or even to summer cottages hidden next to lakes somewhere in the Finnish countryside. Sigh. But this is what I signed up for - no schedules, no travel plans, just ballet and beach. The weather is no longer beachy, but thank goodness for ballet!

Toes and Treats

The first week went swell (read my previous post), the second week started stiff-bodied. Could not believe that two days of not doing anything would throw me off my game. But that´s what happens with daily classes - the more you dance, the more you notice even the little breaks in-between. I remember our teacher M-P telling that she used to hate Mondays, because of Sundays off! Then there is the fact that I´m no longer twenty, which means more up-keep and maintenance. You can´t take anything for granted anymore! And do you remember the toes I banged first day? Well, they are still bothering me on the big jumps. That´s why I took yesterday off, to add a third day to this weekend and let them little toes heal properly. 

So, Monday did not start with a bang, but it ended with corks flying. Had a lovely get-together with my ballet girls at a fairly swanky brasserie. Guess what we talked about? Yup, ballet. It´s so much fun to be among dancers, you never run out of topics (dance!) or things to do (dance!). Oh, and the cava and pink raspberry mousse cake was very nice too. Talking about treats, I have decided to limit my chocolate intake to posh Varlhorna only. It´s so expensive that I dare not buy more than 3 pieces at a time! But this way I can have my choc, and eat it too. Another boring fact of life after thirtysomething: your metabolism slows down, making it harder to keep excess weight off. Another reason why I love ballet: it is the best kind of interval training - which raises you metabolism! Now, where is my chocolate?

O Pointe Shoes, Where Art Thou?

Tuesday we went shopping for pointe shoes, but left empty-handed. Well, I did find Bloch Pumps on sale, but the pointe shoes came in all the wrong sizes and widths. I did, however, get to try Bloch´s Morph -model, but it´s not the fit I had hoped for. And I didn´t care for the pre-inserted spongy bit inside the box. It just felt weird. I also tried the Balance European, but I was not so convinced as to hand over my money. The sales-girl was very nice and helpful, but sadly had little knowledge about pointe shoes (which she admitted herself). The shop does specialize in dance sports, not ballet, so I had figured as much coming in. We had been hoping to go to Grishko´s own small store across the Opera, but it´s closed for all of July. Like I said, no luck in the shoe department.

Morphs and Euopeans, I think..

By Wednesday I was still dancing way off my game, not helped at all by the worst case of crankiness. I guess vacations are no guarantee for non-stop fun & cheer. I just could not find my center, pirouettes were all over the place and I kept messing up combinations I had already learned! Grrr.. After class, I just stayed on and practiced on my own - which I like to do whenever I get the chance. I got some extra pointers from our Summer Sub, who was in no hurry to leave. Might as well share them with you.

Class Notes

Pirouettes - for a clean double, you need hardly any impulse. Certainly not the kind that would have you spinning like Baryshnikov in White Nights. If you had the skill. Go on, sit back and dream.. However, all you need is love and a deep plie, instant pose, and quick spotting of the head. Nothing new then. My biggest obstacle is that I overthink my turns, and that I get too excited (as in nervous excitement). Then, at the last moment I do something that throws me off my axis. The point is, that I really need to learn how to relax. Because whenever I´ve been calm & collected, turns just happen. I´m not saying to dance carelessly, but to care less. Like, pirouettes? Sure, whatever.

Economical dancing - how to dance with the least effort and still be on top of the music, with clean and sharp technique? Don´t muck about with anything that does not belong in the choreography. No adjusting of positions, no shifting around. Keep it simple where you can. Be fluid in your movements, not superfluous.

Fouettés Fun? Why, Yes.

Thursday back in business at last! Our Summer Sub gave us another challenging and fun center to do, and this time I also got the tricky ballotté sequence right. The adagio has been one of my favorites, I almost wish I could video it and share with you :) Pirouettes were kind of there, The Fairy was back in the house, but she´s a lazy girl, that one! Only at the end of class, I finally managed to reign her back in. We did a combination of emboité jumps and sous tenus: 4 x emboité - 2 x sous tenu - repeated twice - third sequence starts the same way, but after the final sous tenus straight into fouetté turns, in attitude devant, with arms at the side. That was a totally new move for me! And the first time anything fouetté-related was actual fun (and not desperate).

Who Needs Botox?

Still, could not resist staying behind after class. I find it odd that everyone else is always in such a hurry to leave class, even when there is space and time to dance some more! Sometimes I´ve turned my best pirouettes après-ballet, when I´m all warmed-up, yet totally relaxed. So I practiced more turns, and discovered I can do piqué turns in arabesque and in attitude (sort of). I could have gone on forever, which made my teacher comment that I reminded her of her 12-year old self, always staying behind to work. Last week I was estimated 10 years younger, this week I´m twelve. At this rate I will soon be reborn. Hey, I read somewhere that you only grow old when you stop dancing! So let´s all not.

Dancathon - First Week Recap

I really could get used to this way of life.. It´s Sunday afternoon, and I´m as relaxed as can be. No getting ready for another week in the office, instead 14 more days of vacationing and loads of ballet. Daily ballet in fact. What a nice ring that has. Dai-ly bal-let. I´m sorry to rub it in, especially to any reader who has to wait until the end of summer for their dance studios to re-open. But I really had forgotten what a difference it makes in your dancing! Everything becomes more natural, more responsive and less strained. Oh, and let´s not forget the gorgeous outdoors, the beach and the sun! It all makes for one seriously happy combination.

Roll out your landing gear!

Beginning of this week, it almost came to an untimely and disastrous end. I landed badly from a jump. We were practicing grand allegro in center, traveling in four diagonals. Tombé pas de bourré - glissade - grand pas de chat - contretemps - repeated three times - and on the final fourth sequence, instead of grand pas de chat one big saut de chat. This is where you start like a pas de chat, but developpé the front leg in mid-air. It is a new jump for me, tried it a couple of times, but certainly not part of "my repertory". On the left, it went suprisingly well, but on the right.. Oh dear. I had traveled too far, and was jumping off-mirror, without any visual feedback. Mid-air I did something weird, and suddenly had no sense of my placing and timing. It was like flying in the dark, without radar. I came down with my left landing gear still in, that is on pointed toes. Ouch! 

Luckily I landed on two feet, and the toes of my left foot kind of rolled under. God, I would have fainted at the sound of breaking bones! Most of the impact I felt between the third and fourth metatarsals, right at the base of the toes. There was some minor bruising the next day, and I went right back to class. It really only bothers me coming down from a big jump, and on one foot. Which I stupidly keep forgetting. Somehow I have managed to bang the same spot every class, until I had the better idea of easing off it. Last Friday I only did some lite big jumps, and with the added weekend-break the sorry foot seems to be okay now. I hate to think that my dance-vacation could have gone to the dogs.. 

You win some, you lose some, sometimes it rains, and sometimes you get to dance.

Alas, it did not. Phew. Tuesday I went to The Other Place, to try out a different class and a new teacher. Hmm.. What can I say? Every dancer experiences this. Sometimes you come across a class which would have been terrific at another point in your "career", but now it just does not happen. I did appreciate this newly graduated teacher´s eagerness and the knowledgeable preparation that went into the class. She even brought along textbooks and pictures, which we proceeded to look at mid-barre.. For me, however, this disrupts the flow and pace of the lesson. Even though it is commendable that a teacher has such keen interest to share her knowledge with students. As long as you balance theory with practice. Class is short enough at 60-90 minutes. 

The anatomy & alignment lecture, however, was not my reason for not "feeling" the class. I know many others who did. A friend of mine was quite excited after class, saying that she really liked this teacher. I don´t consider it bad judgement at all, it merely goes to show that there are different needs at different times. In the past two years I have been learning a lot of new things, about technique but also about what actually happens between the steps. I have written a lot about it in this blog, but to recap: it has to do with breathing and elongating, phrasing the music, bringing something of yourself into it, of telling a story with the very first movement. There is still focus on very clean technique, but with a new emphasis on expression and artistry. It has been both a relevating and liberating experience.

The zen of ballet class

It is also the very antithesis of robotic dancing, something our teacher M-P disdains greatly. This class at The Other Place had nothing to do with robots, thank goodness, but the movement quality is somewhat sporty, with stick-it-out-there tendu degagés and bouncy pliés. There are some beautiful cambrés, but mostly class feels like a hurried gym exercise. There is a lot of choreography even for the first pliés and tendus, and I can see how others like as much variety as possible.. But it´s not the best way for me to get going. I need that moment of zen to find my center. Give me a simple beginning, some beautiful music and I´m a happy (and properly warmed-up) dancer already! Must be my old age ;) So, despite one very energetic teacher, and lots of sensible focus on anatomical placement, I leave class without my usual après-ballet buzz. I gave it another go on Friday, even switching levels, but with the same result. Class just feels like I´m taking a step back into the wrong direction. But it´s not the teacher´s fault. 

Breathe!

Classes with my own school´s Summer Sub are, on the other hand, getting better every time. The barre is still a little too short & lite for my liking, and I wish we could repeat at least a third of it. I am not the only one who thinks the same, and we are currently wondering if and how we should bring this up.. The exercices are good, we just want more! There are also considerably less corrections at the barre, at least compared to our regular teachers (and even less than at The Other Place). Much more focus is placed on correct breathing - very important - and economical movement. This is something our other teacher, M-P, has also talked about. You can´t be at 110% all the time, or your dancing will look contrived, instead of effortless. It is something that is very hard to teach in the beginning, as muscle memory and strength have not yet developed. But it is a valuable lesson, one that I´m continuously learning.

Oh dear, this is turning into a mid-term paper, not a blog post. I do hope you´re not tempted to surf elsewhere before getting to the closing sentence.. Please let me know if I´m writing too lengthy posts! I was actually planning to do daily short posts this week, but it has been to darn hot to blog. Anyway, it has been a terrific week, even with the classes at The Other Place. You always learn something, maybe a new step, or a new pointe of view. Sometimes there are ahaa-moments, thrills and triple pirouettes. Sometimes it´s just a work-out. But it´s all good. Good to be alive, and dancing.


P.S. Pictures were taken today on my local waterfront trail, around 20:00 hrs (8 p.m.). It´s midsummer, so the sun does not set in Helsinki until 22:39 hrs. All this light = lots of extra energy to dance!

Summer Dancathon!

It´s official. I´m on my first decent vacation in years. Three weeks of blissful not-doing-anything, except heading to the beach. And ballet. Lots of ballet! Since there are no summer-intensives for adults here in Helsinki (and I´m lacking the funds to travel), I have compiled my own ballet intensive, with daily classes at two different studios. The only drawback is that there is not much variety in classes. Both my favorite teachers are on vacation too, and at both open studios there is currently only one teacher subbing for the next two weeks. But it is summer, I´m out of the office, and I get to dance. Not really complaining here.

My own regular teacher/mentor Gabriella already handed over the reigns a week ago, and what a awesome rule it was! Classes progressed from the first to last, adding more challenges as we danced along. Got to do lots of batterie again, quick allegros, grand pirouettes, complex variations across the floor and and big port de bras. In our last summer class we did this beautiful adagio, with specific focus on épaulemant: "you have to dance from the heart", she said, laying hands to her chest. "All movement has to come from the heart!". This is so important to remember, especially in technique class where your brain is doing overtime to produce clean lines and accurate steps. You gotta put yourself out there, and not be scared to let your personality shine through! 

Class ended with a crazy grand allegro en manège: valses en tournant, tour jetés, and coming down from entrelacé, fouetté around, step and grand pas de chat. That last big jump - it´s been a long time since I haven´t felt any restriction, no stiffness, no nothing. Awesome! After our final reverance, we thanked with the longest applause, until our teacher waved us off, all embarrassed (and obviously very pleased). :) 

So, until mid-August, new styles and new teachers. It always does you good, as long as you bring the right attitude into class and work as hard and carefully as usual. My own studio´s Summer Sub (Silvia) has already proven to be an interesting experience. She is Spanish, was primarily educated in the Vaganova school, but has since picked up influences from the American (think Balanchine) and Cuban schools, plus contemporary dance (Graham, Cunnigham). I like that she too has actually performed as a classical ballet dancer, in Mexico´s National Ballet and later in Germany. 

Silvia´s class very much focuses on center exercices, with beautiful upper body movements and very quick and strong jumps. She pays particular attention to proper breathing during dancing, and to the phrasing of the music. The center I like very much indeed, but the barre is still a bit too light and short for my liking. Her teaching style is also somewhat more relaxed, for instance she lets us do our own preparations at the barre, and our own stretching before center. Whereas Gabriella and M-P always choreograph the entire class. I don´t mind so much, it´s quite common practice - but I do miss the concentrated feeling of a class working and dancing completely in unison. But all in all, a positive experience.  Really looking forward to more!

My weekly dance schedule:

Monday: Advanced ballet, 90 min (Silvia)

Tuesday: Adv ballet, 90 min, new teacher (N), different studio, today is the first time

Wednesday: Adv ballet 90 min (S), followed by 60 min basic level (S), which I do on pointe

Thursday: Basic-Intermediate 75 min (N), 15 minutes at end of class for beginning pointe, 

followed by 90 min of adv ballet (S). Have to switch studios for this one, luckily they are close-by.

Friday: Adv ballet, 90 min (N)

Weekends: no ballet, just R&R

I´m also planning to finally buy a new camera, so there may be more photos in the future. Most likely these will be shots of pointe shoes and beaches, but if we can get any decent ballet photos.. who knows? Might be time for a full-body-shot. Yikes.. Well, that is it for my first dancatahon post. More to come. Hope you all have a wonderful summer dancing and relaxing!

Picture above post: "Ballet on the Beach" by Loudon Sainthill (1918-1969).
Medium: watercolour and ink.